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The Dark Night of the Soul: What You Need to Know

Mystics and ancient priestesses have talked about the Dark Night of the Soul throughout history. But it was John of the Cross, a Carmelite priest, who wrote a poem called the Dark Night of the Soul (Noche Oscura). Since then, the term became widely used to describe one of the spiritual awakening stages.

The Dark Night of the Soul corresponds with stage 3 in the transformation journey. However, you can experience this stage even without going through the Dark Night of the soul.


To remind you, the 7 stages of transformation are:

  • Stage 1: Cry for help
  • Stage 2: The Initiation
  • Stage 3: The Dark Night of the Soul
  • Stage 4: Distant Dawn
  • Stage 5: Tapping into Purpose
  • Stage 6: Balance and Foundations
  • Stage 7: Inner Power


You can also watch a video where I walk you through the 7 stages of spiritual awakening.

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What is the Dark Night of the Soul?

I’ve witnessed many people going through the Dark Night of the Soul. I first learned about this mystic experience as a very young girl without knowing the term. I was gifted to have the opportunity to see it at a very young age and also understand the purpose of the Dark Night of the Soul. 

Although it wasn’t my own experience back then, it was inscribed into my soul. In this particular case, it was more intense Dark Night than any other I’ve seen after. 

Sometimes to awaken and see life through the lens of love, our soul needs to shake our world. Otherwise, we would ignore her incessant calling for us to return to our divinity. The spiritual awakening can happen spontaneously, under the guidance of a spiritual teacher, or something painful triggers it.


Many lightworkers accelerate their awakening process because of their intense longing to return home –  to a lighter denisty.


(If you feel like you’re here to help the world to become a better place, but you don’t know where to begin and why you feel it – watch the video on 10 Signs of Lightworkers.)

So it happens that we might go through the Dark Night of the Soul at some point. We feel like life lost its meaning during this sacred and harrowing period of our lives. We feel isolated and disconnected, not just from others but also from God and the universe.  


The Dark Night of the Soul feels like a mini-death of our soul. When, in fact, it’s mini-death of our ego. 


During the Dark Night of the Soul, something we identify ourselves with is taken away from us. It can be the death of someone we loved, a separation from a lifelong partner, meeting, and instantly losing the love of your life, an illness, or losing financial stability. It’s like the ground shakes beneath our feet, and we don’t know who we are anymore. The meaning of our previous life is gone. Our identities and personalities are dying, one after another. 

Unlike the depression, the Dark Night of the Soul is primarily an experience of our soul. And it’s even more extreme because the vast majority of people aren’t in a conscious relationship with their souls. Then the Dark Night comes, and they feel a sense of loss of something they hadn’t known existed.

During the Dark Night of the Soul, your soul calls for your attention in the most sensitive spot. Slowly but surely, you’re unplugging from the illusions of the 3D reality. By emptying yourself of the false beliefs, you’re creating space for the new you. The new you is aligned with your soul and your higher self. As you start getting to the other side of the tunnel, something in you will guide you to embody your soul, and this is the beginning of self-mastery. 


Your soul has always been calling you, but now you can’t miss her cry anymore. For once, you can hear with your spiritual hearing. You’re returning to your true origin, which is love. 



How Long Can the Dark Night of the Soul Last?

The Dark Night of the Soul will last as long as it needs to awaken you to become a spiritual human. However, it lasts longer than one night. Speaking from my own experience, I’ve seen people going through it within 7 days, as well as 3 months or up to a year and a half. In some cases, even for a couple of years or decades. During this time, you actually feel like the days turned into night. Thus the subjective concept of time feels even longer. You’re painfully aware of every fleeting second.

As a healer and coach, I’ve understood that we can prolong the Dark Night of the Soul by resisting what is happening. Instead of surrendering to the process and facing all the fears and illusions coming to the surface, we might want to analyze it and hold onto the old life. Some people truly dive deep into this divinely guided process and then step into their soul purpose more boldly. On the other hand, those who resist it fluctuate somewhere between the old and the new, not really being a part of any of them. 


What Is the Purpose of Experiencing It?

After the Dark Night of the Soul ends, you become a new person. The piercing pain has awakened you to the true capacity of your heart. You can see the world with a restored inner vision. The Dark Night of the Soul brings you the possibility to emerge out of the most painful period of your life as a transformed being with a heightened level of consciousness. 


During the third stage of the transformational journey, you can establish a two-sided dialogue with your soul. 


In the Dark Night of the Soul, you strip the layers of who you thought you were. All those identities begin to die — one after another. You have the opportunity to realize that you’re not your money, status, relationships, your job. And more importantly, you realize that you don’t have to walk the path you had believed would be your life. You’re reborn, and thus you can choose a life that reflects your truest self. As opposed to the conditioning of our family, surrounding, society. You’re stepping out of the unconscious reaction to conscious creation. 


You may recognize the most liberating truth of all – you already have everything within yourself. 


You’re your own person – own soul. Be your own before belonging to anything and anyone else.

You don’t need more money to feel worthy. Alike, you don’t need your other half to feel loved and whole. Fill yourself up with so much love that nothing can lack in your life. You’re the one you had been waiting for the whole time. Can you acknowledge it in this instant? Accept it in your heart if it’s only for a fleeting moment. 


After the Dark Night of the Soul

When the worst is behind you, you start transitioning to your new life. Now, you can’t fit into the old world anymore. Although many people try it. What happens after the Dark Night of the Soul is up to you. Some people continue to deepen their new-found sense of life and self. While some fear their experience and allow their fear to rule their lives once again. Yet, this time, they’re aware of it. 

Either case, after the Dark Night of the Soul, you’ll continue going through spiritual tests and learning. Your soul will lovingly guide you to the next levels and push you to your limits again and again. Our being truly has infinite layers to which we’re awakening. Spiritual evolution doesn’t end here. Neither it ends with enlightenment. Every layer has something to teach you. 


The Dark Night of the Soul isn’t the end. It’s the beginning. You’re born again. 


As long as you maintain a conscious connection with your soul and you keep your heart chakra opened, you’ll grow fast. Remember that you can fly towards it by applying your free will, resist the change and wait, or take steps back. It’s your choice. 


Would you like to change your subconscious beliefs and reconnect with your soul? Let us work together through COACHING SESSIONS.


Watch my Video on the Dark Night of the Soul

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