Are you feeling stressed without actually knowing why? When I was still employed and working in an open office, I could see the stress all around me. In people hurrying in the streets, children worrying about their exams or employees who are unhappy and overloaded at work. The stress is wherever you look.
We don’t have time for our hobbies, families, friends, and for ourselves. The habit of constantly doing things have become a norm by which we measure success. Yet no one seems to be any happier by being busy.
A deeper look at feeling stressed
I discovered that I feel stressed for only one reason – when I don’t do what I genuinely want to be doing and what I love. The feeling of wasting time drives me crazy and adds more stress and pressure on me.
We feel stressed when we think that some situation or task is way above our capacities to handle them or when we’re “trapped” in situation or people we don’t want to be.
Stress can teach us precious lessons about what we value and want. There can surely be some challenges while doing what we love but this is the normal stress which returns to balance once the challenge is over. But if we spend our days doing what we feel like we should be doing, it leads to unhappiness, depression, and long-term stress.
An interesting fact is that the body naturally returns the stress levels to normal. But, it is our mind that cannot find ease again and is feeling stressed out.
Stress is a condition of the mind.
Busyness and stress is a learned habit when we’re in unwanted situations. We can feel stress while talking to someone we fear and dislike or when we’re in a job that drains us. Therefore, we can use it as a valuable guide to show us what it is that we value and what we would like to know or do instead.
If you’re feeling stressed out at work, there is a high chance that you either don’t like the job or some specific project, situation, or principles of your company. You can either think about what you would want to do instead or what you could change at your company so you’d feel more at ease.
Getting clear on what stresses you is the crucial step on the way to reduce stress.
Find out WHY you’re feeling stressed out
Become very clear on what kinds of situations bring you stress and also why. Go deeper to discover what exactly it is that stresses you about the situation.
Let’s stay with the stress at work for example.
Is it a particular project that stresses you?
Do you feel like you lack knowledge or expertise to do good work so you’re stressed that others will find out your weaknesses?
Or do you feel stressed about some person?
If so what kind of trait do you like the least about him or her?
Maybe your boss is too chaotic, and you’d like to have your work and project more organized. Or he is too bossy, and you’d want to create own boundaries.
Train yourself to listen to the guidance that the stress has for you. It wants you to change something so you can create the lifestyle that is more aligned with your core values.
When we spend some time discovering why we feel stressed, we can find out valuable information about what we can change. Or otherwise, our mind will continue sending warning signs about something we don’t pay attention to us.
Instead of avoiding stress, we can sit with it and ask what kinds of lessons there are for us to learn. In this way, we can slowly begin reducing the stress gradually and also make empowering changes in our lives.
Stress is not sexy
Once you’re clearer on why you feel stressed, it’s time to re-frame your perspective on stress. We want to rewire the mind, so it values being in peace more than feeling stressed.
The logical part of the mind needs proofs and reason why to give up something. It’s like a baby who doesn’t like eating a vegetable, and we have to give her good enough reasons why the greens are good and healthy.
Here you can find 6 excellent reasons why feeling stressed out doesn’t serve you in the long-run.
1. When you’re feeling stressed out, you dim your light
First of all, remember that there is nothing sexy about feeling stressed out.
Do you know anyone who is busy and always worry about something? Do you find that person energetically attractive? I don’t think so.
When we’re busy, we have no time to shine our light and be relaxed.
It’s like being hidden in a cloud which is all around us and saying don’t dare to come closer to me; I’m too busy! This is not so fun for your friends and family who loves when you’re relaxed and shiny.
When you relax more and put your to-do list into perspective then more abundance comes your way.
2. Stress makes us age faster
When we’re stressed, we don’t breathe properly, and body cells lack oxygen. The body also stores toxins from negative emotions which makes us to age much faster.
On top of that, stress is also one of the most common causes of diseases such as cancer. I think that this is a pretty high price to pay. It helps to be more mindful of what is happening to our body while we allow ourselves to be weighted down by problems. The question is; is it all worth it?
3. Stress suppresses creativity
Have you ever taken a shower or walk and then got a fantastic idea? Creativity and new solutions need space and light.
When we let go of something for a moment, we allow our mind some time to reassess what it knows so it can nicely put it back together with a new solution.
On the contrary, when we feel stressed, we’re trapped in a hamster wheel rolling over the same solutions. If you have own business or want to get creative with reorganizing your home, then give yourself time to relax to gain a new perspective.
4. Stress is contagious
Has it ever happened to you that your friend was stressing out and then you started feeling stressed out too?
Stress, just like any other emotion, is contagious.
We can literally pollute someone’s environment by talking about our problems and what doesn’t work. Conversely, when stressed people surround us, the chances are that sooner or later, we begin to feel stressed too.
They can always convince you that there are plenty of reasons to feel stressed and your mind will sooner or later believe them.
5. Stress damages relationships
Your family and friends want the fun and happy part of you. When you’re stressed, it’s likely that you have less intimacy and in-depth conversations with your spouse.
Stress leaves us feeling separated from others in our tiny bubbles.
These bubbles tend to make others feel detached from us too. This can be a vicious circle. Especially, when we feel stressed, we need more genuine human contact to get us out of our little world. Indulge yourself in time spent with your partner or friends and leave the stress behind the door.
6. Blaming others
At some point, you’ve chosen people and situations in your life. You’ve co-created them, and by feeling like a victim, you’re getting rid of strength to change it. It’s absolutely okay.
Anyway be honest about what you like and dislike in your life right now but then go and change it little by little. The sooner you begin, the sooner you create the lifestyle that you desire.
Nothing, absolutely nothing, is set in stone and unchangeable. Do one change at a time, and you’ll feel so empowered that you’ll not want to stop anymore.