Are you comparing yourself to others to the point that it paralyzes you from doing you? You don’t need to be a coach or a healer to know that this is a widespread trap. Comparison is a trap of our ego. It diminishes who we are and the impact we could have. Not only that comparing yourself to others is a thief of all joy, but it’s also an illusion. So, let’s put things into perspective and shed some light on this topic.
Comparing Yourself to Others is a Mirror Reality
You might have heard me saying that we shouldn’t be experiencing ourselves from the outside. Instead of going fully in and focusing on our inner beauty, we’re here to express; we use others as a permission slip for not showing up. We use other people against ourselves. Instead of having a direct relationship with who we are. I believe I’ve talked about this in my video on healing the abandonment wound; if you want, you can watch it here.
Our perspective of reality is distorted. The hologram we create around ourselves is fabricated with illusions, half-truths, and wounded consciousness.
When we look outside ourselves and use the distorted mirror to judge ourselves, we live in a cycle that doesn’t lead to anything. By comparing yourself to others, you use other people and their success against yourself. Why would you want to do that? Although the reasons are numerous, they always come back to our unhealed inner child wounds. And not only that, they go back to the separation wound we have as humankind.
Comparing yourself to others doesn’t actually allow you to see who you are. Neither are you seeing other people. That’s why I call it a mirror reality because you see reflections of the parts of you that are unloved and feel unworthy. Instead of going within and devoting the time to healing them, you project them outside of yourself. This is how the psychological projections work.
Comparing yourself to others comes from 3 factors:
- Wounded inner child.
- The collective separation wound (I’ll talk about it more in the future).
None of these 3 factors have anything to do with reality. None of them are working in your favor unless you start actively working with them. Whenever you’re comparing yourself to others, you’re giving space to your ego and your inner child to have a pity party. Instead, we should understand their perspectives and create a space where they can truly heal.
A Lightworker Comparison Trap
For now, let’s just think about the lightworkers as people who show up for their purpose, and they stop dimming their light. Lightworkers are far from perfect, and usually, they didn’t have the best childhoods. Still, they show up for their own healing, which later on naturally transcribes into being in service to others. Yet, as I’ve seen numerous times as a soul healer, lightworkers stop themselves before they even fully begin. They compare themselves to other lightworkers already doing their magic. And then they let their minds get the best out of them.
Here is the truth. If your soul is calling you to step up, rise, and shine, it means you are ready. It means that you’ve been training for this life – this very moment – and you can do it. Not only can you do it, but it’s exactly what will lead you to the highest and most radiant expression of self. Why on Earth would you spend any second comparing yourself to others?
Everyone has their own journey. Everyone has their own highest path that they can choose to align with at any moment. This has nothing – absolutely nothing – to do with others. This journey is ONLY about you. But as I had explained earlier, the ego can make you believe that there isn’t enough space for you. Even better, the ego might convince you that it’s too late for you. Leaving you to sit by the sidelines of what could be your life if only you had chosen it.
Now, your highest journey will be unique to you. It can’t be actually compared because it has nothing to do with anyone else but you. Yes, we’re on this planet in a big number. And yes, our lives intertwine. But you have your individual soul’s plan to align with. And nothing and no one can take your piece of a cake. Because there isn’t one cake as we’d been made to believe. You have your own cake, and it’ll stay there waiting for you. Forever. Do you need another life? No problem. Your cake is still there. Are you ready now? No problem, you can indulge in your cake now. And guess what happens next? There is another piece of cake only for you. And another one. And another. It stretches all the way to eternity.
Others Are NOT Your Competitors. They’re Your Helpers
When you compare yourself to others already living their purpose, unconsciously, you might believe that there is less room for you. But what if it was the other way around? What if the very fact that other people live their purpose and are healing was your permission slip to do the same? What if their combined energy and effort make it a lot easier for you? Have you ever considered that possibility?
We focus so much on what is dividing us rather than uniting us. Unfortunately, the same is true for so-called spirituality. The illusion of separation runs so deep that people believe it to be true without pausing and thinking whether it really makes sense.
What if there were an infinite number of possibilities for every individual to express themselves? And what if all of them were valid? Wouldn’t it take pressure off to figure out the only right way?
Have you ever consider how your life could change if you focused on what’s uniting us? For lightworkers, this means realizing that other lightworkers are in this whole thing with you. Not only that, but they also have your back. Now, I know there are all levels of consciousness being played out in spirituality, just like anywhere else in society. But this doesn’t have to bother you as long as you focus on your True North.
Knowing that there are millions of other lightworkers makes my heart very joyful. Why? Because it means more space for co-creation. It also means that more souls are volunteering to raise the collective consciousness. Which is very comforting. Who would want to do this alone?
Our number is our strength. Don’t use others as your excuse.
Instead of comparing yourself to others, consider how others can help you. They’re already helping you one way or another. Falling in love with your purpose is your remedy to any comparison. When you devote yourself to something meaningful to you, there is no space for comparison, envy, or jealousy.
If you didn’t compare yourself to others, what would you create?
How can other people be your permission slip to show up for your purpose?
What exists beyond comparison that you’ve never considered?
How much more love and abundance could flow to your life if you embrace your purpose?
To which degree is comparing yourself to others stopping you?
How much energy does it cost you every day?
What else could you create with that energy?
What is the deepest truth in your heart regarding your place in the world?