Learning how to practice self-love and acceptance will change your world. Everything in our lives starts with ourselves. I know that there are many opinions about self-love being selfish, but there is nothing further from the truth.
Importance of self-love and acceptance
Imagine Lara who is a mother, and she doesn’t love herself. She is often upset with her spouse and kids because she is unhappy in her life. Lara believes that she needs to be there for others first and she never has time for herself and her dreams. Most of the days, Lara feels burned out and like her life lacks a deeper sense.
As a result, Lara doesn’t enjoy taking care of her children because she feels depleted. Often, she argues with her spouse who is selfish in her eyes because he is doing what he likes to do.
Now think about it for a while. How much joy and love can Lara bring to others?
I know that it’s valuable to do the home duties. It sometimes requires a lot of energy and work. But what might be even more important later for her marriage, herself, and especially for her children is the love and energy she radiates.
Now imagine Lara’s complete opposite, Susan. Susan knows that a happy family and also other relationships start with self-love. Therefore, she spends few minutes here and there on doing what she loves – painting pictures. It fulfills her, and it also gives her ton of fresh energy which she then happily shares with her family.
Her children love painting with her as well, and they’re looking forward to having those creative moments every day. After a while, Susan started selling her art online, and her husband respects her for being independent, and he appreciates her happy mood.
On these two examples, I want you to understand why self-love is not selfish. It cannot be. Because when we love ourselves, we inevitably love others. We share our happiness with the people in our lives, and they feel good in our presence. It also motivates them to do things that they enjoy doing as well.
Love either is or isn’t. If you don’t love yourself, you don’t know how to love others without conditions.
Self-love isn’t selfish
When I still lived in China, I noticed one interesting thing. The more I was doing things that I enjoyed, the more I loved myself. Love as a verb is a key to self-love. When we do what we love then inevitably we become love.
The simple act of doing what inspires you and makes you happy will bring you into vibrations of love. It doesn’t mean that you must be doing only the things you love all the time. It means that you should be doing some of the things that make your heart sing when you can.
It can be 30 minutes a day, or it can be two hours per week. One of the most common excuses is a lack of time. But you can find a few minutes here and there and see where it goes.
I like to think about self-love as an act for myself and also for others.
As I said earlier, when we love ourselves, we’re also much nicer to other people. And when we follow our hearts, very often we create something beautiful and useful for others too. All of the great businesses have started this way. All of the great paintings, theater plays, and songs have been created because someone has followed what they loved.
How to practice self-love and acceptance
The easiest way to start is to write down all the great things which you want to experience in your life. Kind of like a bucket list. I did this a couple of years ago in China, and since then almost everything has happened, and the rest happened during 2017.
I’ve realized that I’m the only person in this whole world with whom I spend every single second, so I’ve decided to enjoy it and make it fun. I told myself that I was tired of waiting for miracles, or someone special, or for better circumstances.
About 8 years ago, I decided to make my dreams happen and also enjoy the process. My list of things that I wanted to do included things that I’d been postponing or even afraid of doing but deep inside I wanted them badly. Creating the list of things I want is more about the way I want to feel while doing them. I like to feel free, inspired, and deeply rooted in life itself and connected with the Universe.
Let’s say that you love water, but you’ve never learned to swim properly. Ask yourself whether you’d like to be the man or woman who has never even tried? Do you want to die without knowing the feeling of how it is to merge with water? If not, then go to a swimming pool and train breathing under the water so you can then swim more effortlessly.
The way how to practice self-love and acceptance is about embracing your life and also yourself. It’s never too late to dream again and have new hobbies. We don’t need to live life without joy and full of obligations. Do the things that make you feel loved and loving. Take care of yourself and schedule in some “me time” and you’ll see that you’re falling in love with yourself because you allowed yourself to feel more love.